Monthly Archives: September 2014

Satire

#Political Madness

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Our Commander in Chief saluted with a cup of coffee in his right hand, and while the military is up in arms, so to speak, Starbucks couldn’t be happier.  Well, perhaps Starbucks could have been happier, would our Commander in Chief been holding a cup from their fine establishment.  Imagine the advertisement: Starbucks (and our President) salutes the military!

And while coffee is great (I’m as hopelessly addicted as the now deceased Hugo Chavez, who reportedly drank fifty cups a day), the salute is sacred.  The history of the salute goes back in time to the stone age, or later, when General T Rex, not to be confused with the hip-hop artists Ty Rex, and General Spino Saurus approached one another on the field of battle to negotiate a treatise.  The two generals came together and saluted, showing that they weren’t carrying ninja stars.  They talked, negotiated, and only then did they go about savagely killing one another.

Show up with a hot cup of joe, and the other might assume that you intend to splash this in their face, or that there might be a dagger inside.  Do this with a Starbucks logo on the cup, and you could be facing a lawsuit, for this is neither the preferred nor authorized method of waking up in the morning.

So get it right, Commander in Chief; hold the coffee in your left hand, if you must (and of course you must, I mean, everyone loves coffee) and salute with an open hand; it shows that you’re a trustworthy guy, and not sneaky in the least, honors the tradition, and then, and only then, should you go and bomb the terrorists.

For further lessons in military etiquette, please feel free to contact me via email.  We’ll hold a coffee summit, and chat!

Opinion, Uncategorized

Political Madness

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There is no greater theater; no greater folly. The Left. The Right. They are actors on stage, well paid, well kept, professing to care about the good of the public, the good of the country, the best in mankind. Greed. Wealth. Corruption proves them otherwise.

We have O’Reilly on Fox News, where so-called spin is disallowed. And over on MSNBC we have Al Sharpton, vilifying viewpoints other than his own. Jon Stewart is a predicable lackey, mining for humor in the fields of Republican folly. Like our elected officials, this is all for show, and we, the viewing public, gladly pay admission.

Granted, involved citizens are rightly concerned for the sanctity of our families and homes, the security of our country. We fear the unknown, the threats toward our very livelihood. We vote for the lesser of evils. But one man’s demons are another man’s angels.
We pray for gotcha’s, pointing out cheats on the other side when both teams are guilty. Yet, our team cheats for the sake of righteousness; to compete, to stay in the game. We wouldn’t have to if you guys played by the rules.

Politics has become a shell game, now you see it, now you don’t. From congressmen up to the President, they are nothing if not adept at avoiding the scandal.

Opinion Creep, that which compels reporters to bias the news, further polarizing the parties, isolating the moderates. But what does this say of the human spirit as the Independent Party grows? Collectively, we maintain freewill. At heart, we are stubborn pissants that refuse to be pigeonholed. We are insolent children, or that breath of fresh air. Reasonable, compromising, not only seeing both sides of the debate, but emphatic to each, and in this, pray God, there is hope.